Super Special Guest Post!

Today’s post is from one of my favorite people, the awesome and adorable Katie Greisiger. Miss Katie is a former resident of Bonaparte House who has since relocated to NYC. I mean, she never would have left Bonaparte otherwise. No one ever leaves Bonaparte…

Katie can be found on Twitter @kgreisig. Enjoy her post!

What the F is going on up at the ol’ Morningside cemetary? No, really, Phantasm was really confusing in the beginning…well, really confusing and “what the fuck” phrase provoking through it’s entirety. It didn’t make me love it any less. So, thank you, Elissa, for asking me to write a guest blog for your 31 days of horror.

The Phantasm experience wouldn’t have even occurred if I hadn’t been such a procrastinator. I’m just one of Elissa’s many friends that have been subjected to watching absurd yet amazing horror films with her. I was supposed to write about The Brood. A film she and I watched along side many others during one of our beer and pizza Friday nights in LA. Suffice to say, my Netflix cue timing did not work out in The Brood’s favor. So, we have Phantasm. A movie Elissa owns but irresponsibly neglected to show me. She robbed me of a great pleasure and I didn’t even know it.

Describing this 1979 flick as fantasy horror is an understatement. It’s crazy shit that should be paired with a joint and that’s my official, more accurate, description. Writer, director Don Coscarelli’s first installment of this four-part series that spans nearly 20 years, tells the strange tale of a teenager, Mike, that spies on the wrong, tall grave robber. The tall man knows Mike has seen too much. He’s pissed. I don’t blame him. No grave robber, no matter how tall, wants his neighboring community to know it’s housing other dimensions filled with slave dwarves. Especially since he’s only been murdering and enslaving people as far back as a horse and buggy…

On a micro-budget the film’s well crafted and scary. It proves it’s point. It may be even scarier than Coscarelli’s IMDB picture. Avoiding that digression…the film’s just as scary as the induced nightmares I had from watching horror films earlier than I probably should have as a kid. Those nightmares were terrifying, didn’t make the most sense and were unrealistically goofy in hindsight.

Phantasm’s goofiness could first be credited to it’s shameless and cheesy special effects. Then maybe to it’s Exorcism-like AND wind-chime laded music score. Followed by barking zombie-midgets and flying silver ball weapons. What do they all have in common? Apparently, Morningside cemetery, that’s what. Well, without giving the ENTIRE movie away to like the five of Elissa’s friends who may have not seen it (why am I the last, Elissa?), let’s just say the somewhat surprise ending left me wide eyed and certain I’d be dreaming about yellow blood, high winds and big nipples.

Also, I really wish I could have been the foley artist on this movie. Damn.

Elissa, next time I’m in LA, we’re watching the Phantasm series AND Bubba Ho-Tep. You owe me.